“So I'm gonna be back next weekend,” I smiled at the Camera. Skype dates with Noah are one of my highlights each day. It's something I can't wait for each day.
“You're actually telling me this time?” Noah jested. “I kind of liked the surprise of last time, though.”
I let out a chuckle. “I did too, don't worry I will surprise you again. There's no way I couldn't see that huge smile you had again.” Noah gave me a cheeky grin as I took a bite of my breakfast.
Today was the complicated day of the week for us. My schedule and his conflicted perfectly so that we can only talk in the morning. Noah has school all day and then Student Council stuff after school for hours. My classes don't start until noon and go until 9 pm. So we could talk after that, but I usually have homework and in the past I've gotten too distracted to finish it.
So here we are at 8:11 am having a breakfast Skype date. “Aren't you happy I taught you how to make French Toast?” I nodded with a huge bite of French Toast in my mouth. “Hey, Nathan!”
That's when I heard Nathan's door close. “Hey, Noah. How are you even awake at this time Aidyn? You don't have classes until noon.” Nathan grabbed the French toast I made for him. “Though I do like that I get breakfast in the morning.”
Noah giggled. “You're welcome!”
Nathan rolled his eyes. “Thanks. Shouldn't you be going, though? You look like you haven't even gotten ready.”
“I probably should get going... I'll talk to you tomorrow night. Remember I'll be at Tiz's tomorrow night, Aunt and Uncle are going out of town so I gotta stay with him.”
Oh ya, since I'm up too late, I sleep in next morning. Then I have class until 5 pm, so we don't talk until the evening. Sorta sucks.“I remember, don't worry.”
Noah grinned from ear to ear. “Aidyn, I love you.”
“Love you too Noah. Have a good day at school.” He gave off one last smile before ending the call. I sat there for a moment, just happy with myself. Once I brought myself back to reality, I noticed Nathan giggling to himself. “Oh, thanks for letting me look like an idiot.”
“No problem, it was a good time.” I threw a bit of icing sugar at him. “You two make a cute couple by the way.”
“Thanks. Say, do you have anyone at home or anywhere?” We've never really had a conversation about his love life. “Actually, since we're going back, how are you related to Carter?”
Nathan gave a little shrug. “Carter and I are technically step-cousins, no blood relation. His mom married my Uncle, who already had Cairo. He's my biological cousin, but I consider them the same to me.” Neat I didn't know Carter had a brother. Not a bad name either, Cairo... “As for relationships, no one has my heart.”
“No one has ya hooked?” Nathan shook his head. “Ever been in a relationship before?”
“Of course, everybody has.” Some people haven't but I won't correct him. “I've been in a few; they didn't last, though.”
“Shitty... guys or girls?” Hey, its 2015 these questions are acceptable!
Nathan laughed. “Both. I'm definitely bisexual. I've done everything with both, and I couldn't tell you which I prefer.” Wow, I did not expect that Nathan would be Bi, I would have pinned him for a straight guy. “I've known since I was young that I was into both guys and girls. It got me into trouble with both genders at the time. I had some good friends, though, and accepting parents.”
Accepting parents... Those are always good to have. “So what about Carter's parents? Why does he not feel safe with them? How come he comes here every so often?”
Nathan finished the last bite of his breakfast. Placing his dish in the sink he spoke, “My uncle is an ass; he's disowned my parent's cause of me. He's a bible thumping bigot. That's why Carter isn't with them; he can't go home to them.”
“Wait, where does he go when he's not here then?” Nathan didn't say anything, which made me think only one thing? “He's homeless...”
“No, he's not... it's just that.” Nathan didn't know what to say. “Yes, he spends a lot of time on the street, and some in stranger’s beds... He's been offered to stay at my place, well my parent's place and Tre's place but he's always running away.”
Is this the same Tre that my brother was talking about the other day? “Damn, why doesn't he just stay?”
“That is a long story Aidyn; one Carter should tell you not I. Plus I need to get to class. See you tonight when you're all done!” Nathan is done with his day around 3, which means we usually don't see each other until after I'm done classes.
“Have fun!” I waved him off while I headed off back to bed for a couple of hours. I'll get up to say hi to Noah, but back to bed, I go after that! Sleep is a little less important than seeing Noah, but it is still important. Back to sleep for a few hours.
Next time I saw daylight was when my second alarm of the day went off. I quickly got up, had a shower and headed off to a long day at the scene shop. Today was the day we finally started building the set for the play we had planned. I was placed in charge of one of the set pieces, so it's quite important I'm there.
I mostly kept to myself, even in class. Not saying much more than needed. Sure there were a couple of others who seemed cool to hang out with, but none of them were in the set building part of the course. Most of the set builders were just here for more building experience, none of them wanted to take the class.
Me, though, this class is what I lived for. The idea that you need to make sets that will support people that can be moved on and off stage potentially. Creating these sets is just fun to me.
I was right in the middle of measuring a couple of two-by-fours when I saw Josh sneaking his way into the scene shop. When he noticed me, he gave a wave before snapping a picture and continuing his adventure through the shop.
Eventually, he got to me. “Hey Aidyn, how's the set coming?”
“We're working on some simple stuff right now. Mostly getting some practice in before we really start the building process.” Josh nodded and took a couple of notes on his notepad. “How'd the story end up the other week?”
He shrugged. “It wasn't all that great. I wrote something else up and told my editor that I'll get the story another time when there is more information. Still trying to convince the director to give me the inside scoop on what the play is.”
I laughed. “We're getting the official script on Monday. Maybe check out the class then?”
“Ya, that sounds like a good idea. Thanks, Aidyn!” This guy, he's barely up to my shoulders, and yet he erupts with energy. Big things, small packages I guess. How the hell did he manage to get into Braidyn's pants?
In grade 8 Braidyn had to be my biggest crush. The star of the soccer team, he seemed good at everything there was. Sure we barely spoke but man he looked good. The way he would sweat after a game just looked amazing. I'm allowed to talk about this, Noah already knows.
Josh was just about to walk away when I spoke up. “Say, Josh, how did you manage to get Braidyn?”
He snorted. “Braidyn actually asked me. He wanted to see what it was like, and he enjoyed it. We've done stuff a few times; he's getting more into it too.” WHAT!? This cannot be true! “I definitely called him cute, but he's the one who wanted some.” Wow... my Braidyn’s world just got thrown upside down.
“Wow, okay... Thanks, I guess. I'll see you later.”
“Yup!” He waved and then jumped into a step. “See ya Mr. Scott!”
I just rolled my eyes. “That's my dad!” We shared a laugh as he walked away. Dam... Braidyn, what's going on in that head of yours? Going after guys now, why?
“Welcome, Noah!” Tiz cheered as he opened the door to his house. Edea and I were laughing and shaking our heads. “Ya, ya giggled away losers. You all know I'm the coolest.”
“Suuuure you care Tiz, suuure you are.” Edea pushed her brother out of the way. “I have to practice violin; student council has to have some sort of talent show planned. Have to make sure I'm on top of my game! Have a good night boys.” and like that Edea was off to her room.
Tiz threw his shoes off into a corner before rushing off into the kitchen. I took his shoes and placed them neatly by all the rest. When I finally got to the kitchen, I wasn't sure what he was making, but it was a mess.
It never fazes me when I find him like this. His room is always a pigsty. Once in a while, his parents used to pile everything owned into the middle of his room. They stopped when he decided to live with the mess, by the mess.
“Are you ever going to be a clean person?” Tiz shrugged with a sandwich in his mouth, trying to say something. “You legit have half the counter covered 'Tiz'” It's what I call the mess he leaves behind; yes I know how it sounds.
He rolled his eyes, finished his bite of food and then spoke. At least he's not entirely disgusting. “It's hard to clean up after yourself that kind of shit takes time.” The mess that is my best friend got to love him.
“It takes like 2 seconds to put your shoes in the right place. Instead of throwing them onto a pile.” He shrugged as he started to drink Orange juice from the carton. “You're hopeless, and that's gross. Other people drink from that.”
He turned it around to reveal a piece of tape with his name on it, on the carton. “Nope, just me.”
“The fact that you have your own carton makes it clear there is a problem with you.” I covered my face and shook my head. “So what is the plan for today?”
Tiz got this grin on his face. “Simple, we play catch up! This is the first solid time I've had with my bestie in years, so I'm going to see where you are.” What the hell does he mean by this? “How are you Kayde and Ashton?”
“Funny you ask that the other day when we were walking home, I found them in the bathroom together.” Tiz knows all about Kayde, Ashton and I fooling around. He might have pinned me and tickled it out of me... It was not fun, and it was almost a smelly mess left over.
Tiz sat down on the other side of the counter and leaned right in. “Do tell me more good sir!” This guy is nothing short of strange.
“Well Kayde wanted to do stuff, and Ashton said he was not into it anymore. That was it.” Tiz gave me a look. “Really, that was it... nothing else happened.”
He looked at me right in the eye. “Kayde didn't ask to get into your pants?”
“Well he has, but not then. Ashton didn't give him a chance; I was dragged out of there so quickly.” Tiz gave me his look again; his 'go on' look. “Ashton did mention that he has been complaining about me having Aidyn though.”
Tiz leaned back and crossed his arms. “Well, Kayde can suck it! You have a boyfriend; he can find himself a fuck boy. I'm sure there's someone who would be more than happy to service him in our school.”
I giggled at his comments. “The circle of gay boys is quite drama-filled at our little school. I hope you know that.”
“Your fault. If you and Aidyn hadn't come out, no one would have, and it would have been silent and drama less.” Only because it wouldn't exist.
After Aidyn and I had told the school, we were together; there were two groups formed. The Anti-gays and the Pro-gays. At first, the Anti-gays ruled the halls, and we were pushed around. But as time went on the Pro-gays started standing up more and more. Eventually, more and more kids came out of the closet and became their true selves.
We sort of started a revolution in our school. “Well, life would be horrible if I couldn't snuggle my Aidyn in public. Those snuggles are the very best like no snuggles ever were.”
He glared at me. “Did you have to quote Pokemon?”
“All day, every day.”
Tiz just rolled his eyes. “Well I think it's cool you and Aidyn are doing the whole long distance thing. Glad, it's working out so far.”
“Ya...” The thought of Aidyn made me smile. “He's only a couple of towns over, and I'll be seeing him this weekend. We'll be talking to him later when he gets done with school.”
“Post-secondary school schedules suck!” Ya, they do. Why can't they be more like Secondary school schedules? “What time is he off at?”
“Bullshit! I'm getting a corporate job! Better yet, Union!” The odds of Tiz going off to school were low enough as it was. Oh well. “Come on; let's get some game time in before your lover gives us a call.”
“He's not my lover!” I yelled at the childlike youth who running away. He stopped to give me the stink eye, though. “You know what, shut up and fight me.”
“Mortal Kombat... now.” And like that he was off again. Mortal Kombat was the one game we were equal at. So who knows who will win.
On my way up to Tiz's room, I stopped to peek in on Edea. See, they have a music room in their house; their family is music nuts; that happens to be soundproof. There are windows to see into the room, though. You can hear just faintly the sound of her violin, and its beauty. She noticed me and gave a little wave before returning to her practice.
When I turned to head to his room, Tiz was standing at his door. “Hey, got eyes for my sister do ya?” I just rolled my eyes. “Well, you'll have to pass the 'brother test' first!”
“When was the last time you played the piano?”
“Changing the subject I see! Clever kid... It's been like 2, or 3 months.” He used to be really really good on piano. He won a few competitions for it. “I should really get back on that...”
“Come on; Scorpion is waiting to kick your ass!” Oh, Tiz... You really are my best friend. The best best friend anyone could have.
Driving into his driveway... the house seemed so unchanged. There was still Micheal's big blue truck, Rownin's big play set. It's just the same as it was last spring... so homey.
I had barely gotten out of the car when the front door opened. Little six-year-old Rownin came bolting out, not to his uncle but me. “CARTER!!” He screamed as he ran arms spread.
His little arms wrapped around my legs and held on tight. “Hey, Rownin.” I messed with his hair. “How are you?”
“Good! I'm in grade one now!”
I lowered myself down to his level. “That's cool, do you like it?”
He nodded. “Ya, some stuff is kind of hard, but mommy and daddy and Uncle Tre are helping me with it.”
“That's good to hear.”
“You're room is still downstairs, you know!” Oh, Tre didn't mention that. “I sometimes like to go in there and play with my toys. Don't worry, though, mommy and I cleaned up all the toys.”
It was Tracy's turn next to say her hellos. Tre's sister and Rownin's mother, Tracy was a kindhearted woman. Her hair is usually dyed some color or another, and she has tattoos all over her. She's a nice person with a rough exterior.
She didn't hug me, but it was clear she was happy to see me. “How was the ride here?”
I shrugged. “Not too bad. We had music playing the entire time.”
“That's good. How about you get inside and have a shower. Get yourself cleaned up a bit.”
"Ya... okay.” I went inside and looked around. The house was basically the same, with little changed here and there. It was basically the same, the same mess, the same stuff. Different couches though.
Downstairs, Tre's space was very different, though. He had gotten new couches; new TV and all of his rock band stuff had a spot. He even got a mini-fridge and had all the newest game systems. Wow... he's gotten a lot of new stuff.
Then there is what was my room... Well, I guess I should say what is my room. It's exactly how I left it. Minus all the dust that was in there. The room is so clean and perfectly set up for me... wow.
Someone came up behind me. “I thought you were going to have a shower?” Tre...
“My room... it's just how I left it.” Even my one poster of assassin's creed and the picture of Lakota and me... everything was waiting for me to come back. Before I knew it, my eyes were turning watery. It felt like a frog was in my throat. “Tre...”
He put his arms around me as I let go of all the stress I had bottled up inside. Tears just started falling, and there was no stopping them. There wasn't anything that could happen that would stop them. Everything was left knowing I'd be back for it all; they knew I'd be back.
“You're always welcome here Carter. I promise.” He rubbed my back. “How about you get into that shower now.” I nodded and went into the bathroom.
I broke down again in the shower. What's wrong with me? I wasn't good enough to stay at home with my parents; my brother isn't even near here... What did I do to deserve this life? I sat there in the shower just overcome with emotions. When I finally got out, I got on a pair of shorts and fell asleep on my bed.
When I finally woke up again, it was only because someone had come into the room. Tracy had come in with a plate of spaghetti, my favorite. “Did I wake you? I didn't mean to.”
I yawned as I stretched. “It's fine; I'm feeling really hungry anyways.” As if on cue my stomach rumbled as loud as it could. “Thank you.”
“No problem. Bring your dish up when you're done.” I nodded and started eating immediately. I wolfed it down. Tracy couldn't have been out of the room more than three minutes before I was done. The worst part was there was still room in my stomach for more.
I slowly came up from downstairs with the plate in my hands. Michael smiled when he saw me. “Hey, how's Carter doing?”
“Good.” I simply replied. “Still hungry, though...”
“Have some more.” Tracy offered. “There is plenty more waiting.” Sure enough, there was PLENTY more. Some meant for Michael’s lunch tomorrow, but I'm not even sure if he could eat all of that. I think it was mostly made for me.
Just as quick as the first, I finished my second plate. This time, I was feeling pretty filled up. “You're one hungry boy.” Tre laughed as he took a bit of his dinner. “How's the stomach now?”
“Much better,” I smiled as I rubbed my satisfied stomach. “I'm all filled up now.”
“Carter, you want to play Lego’s when dinner is done?” Rownin asked, breaking his silence.
“I think I can do that. Better eat up, though, the sooner you're done, the sooner we can play.” Rownin immediately started preparing another bite. Everyone at the table had a good laugh as the kid tried to eat as fast as he could.
When he finished dinner, just like I promised, I played Lego’s with him. As I played, I again started to fall asleep. Eventually, I did. When I woke up, there was a small blanket around me, and a pillow under my head. The clock in the room read 2:47 am... wow I must have been tired. I guess it's time for me to go to actual bed.
I guess I better start getting used to this place again. It's what I'm going to be calling home for a while now. Let's hope it goes better this time than it did last time.
Okay, so Skylar wasn't wildly popular with the 'open relationship' idea I proposed to him. To be honest, that's the reaction I expected to see from Sky. He would probably think it was cheating on me, and it would ruin the experience for him. He's got that kind of heart.
So that means I have to figure out how I can get passed whatever 'this' is. This fear of not seeing it that I have. It just doesn't make sense, I want to see it before I do anything, but I know I can't. This is the only thing that it scares me that I can't see it... I don't get it.
When I think who I could talk to, I think gay guy. But I don't want to talk to Noah or Aidyn about it... I feel like Sky would find out. So who does that leave who might be able to help me? Leo, Markus' older brother.
Just how do I go about asking him? The first step, get to Markus. Luckily we share a block together so it shouldn't be too hard. Once that class finally came around, I sat there waiting for Markus to come. Sure enough, he did, so now I just need to wait until the class work starts.
The moment it did I turned to him. “Markus, can I ask you something?”
He stuttered for a moment. I must have caught him off guard. “Uh, um... ya s-sure go ahead.”
“You're older brother, Leo... He's gay right?”
I think he had nodded before he spoke because there was a longer silence than normal. “Ya, he is. Sorry forgot the whole blind thing.” Knew it. “Why? I know you are with Sky, so why do you want to know that?”
“Well I'm having a problem, and Sky can't help me with it. I just need to talk to someone about it.” 'Problem,' ya like just saying that is going to get me an audience with Markus' older brother.
“Sure, you can come over today if you want. Leo will be home.” Just like that? Really? That's awesome.
I felt a hand on my shoulder. “Get back to work boys.” The teacher calmly told us. I smiled towards Markus before turning to my computer and grabbing my headphones. No need for everyone to hear what my laptop is going to say over again.
Once school let out, I gave my parents a call and told them of the plan. Well, the plan that I was going over to Markus' not what exactly I was doing there. They were okay with it, so we waited for Leo to pick us up.
It wasn't long before a car pulled up in front of us and Markus spoke up. “This is us.” He opened the car door for me, and I hopped in. “This is Greyson, Leo.”
“Hey, Greyson.” Leo, just the guy I wanted to hear. The car ride home was pretty normal. Markus told Leo about his day, and that was about it. It was quite the one sided conversation.
It wasn't long before we got to their place. When we did Markus helped me into their house and to a place to sit. The one unconditional time I accept help was in a new place when I didn't bring my walking stick. I'd be crashing into everything if I was left to fend for myself.
Markus sat down on the couch beside me and from the sounds of it Leo sat in front of us. We sat there in awkward silence for a bit before Markus yelled at me. “Why did you want to talk to my brother? Don't get awkward now Payne!”
I laughed at his attempt to be threatening. “Well... to be upfront, I'm scared of taking the next step in mine and Sky's relationship.”
“Which is?” Leo asked.
I could feel my cheeks start to heat up. “Getting into the major sex stuff... Sky is ready for it and has been for a long time. He's given me many blow jobs, but I can't even do that for him. I'm scared of all of it...”
“That's pretty normal Greyson; it can be a scary thing. A lot of people get nervous at the thought of it.” Not Sky, though... “Sky is probably nervous about it too; he's just made it to the diving board.”
“Diving board?” My metaphor senses are tingling.
Markus snorted beside me. “Think of it this way; you're making a big jump, and you're scared about what you're jumping into. Sky has gotten to the jump and is ready for it; he just wants to take the jump with you.” I KNEW IT! It was a freaking metaphor.
Markus put his hand on me. “It's different for everyone Greyson; some people just get ready faster than others. They have more curiosity or something. First, you have got to overcome your fears, then take the leap!”
“Markus is right on that point Greyson. You just have to get it figured out and then do it.”
I'm scared because I can't see it... but that hasn't stopped me with anything before. So why is it stopping me now? I've felt Sky all over. I know him, every bit of him, and I'm letting this one thing get in the way of bonding with him?
Get over yourself Greyson and get to that high dive! Skylar is waiting for you!
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