Finding My Way Home: Book 2 - Heart And Home

"DEREK! BRENDAN!" I screamed as I ran up to the cabin, or what was left of it.  From what I remembered of the layout, the tree was directly on top of the end of the cabin where the bed was.  I scrambled forward trying to clear the branches so I could get a better look.

"Dan and Karen are on the way!" Edan yelled beside me.  He was holding his cell phone.  I nodded my acknowledgement as I kept clawing at the tree and the crushed walls and roof of the cabin.  "Dan is bringing a chain saw," Edan told me.

"This is where the bed is," I told him.  He started helping me try to clear things away.  It seemed as if hours passed before Dan showed up with the saw.  He was alone.

"Karen is taking the kids over to your place and then she's going to come back here with Daniel," he told me just before he cranked the noisy saw.  He soon had enough debris cleared away that he was able to see cloth sticking out from under the heaviest part of the tree.  It was Derek's shirt.

"DEREK!!" I screamed again.  I thought I could just make out some sound, but it wasn't coming from the part of the cabin we were working on.  It seemed to be from the only thing still standing, the chimney.  I crawled across the roof and tree branches closer to the fireplace of the cabin.  "DEREK! BRENDAN!" I called again.

"DAD!" I heard muffled from underneath the rubble.  "Are you there?"

"DEREK, HOLD ON," I yelled back.  "WE'LL GET YOU OUT OF THERE!"

"DAD, BRENDAN IS HURT!"

"DAN, OVER HERE!" I called, waving him over.  Just then Daniel and Karen showed up.  Karen just stared at the cabin, shaking.  Edan went over to her and wrapped an arm around her.  She returned the embrace as Daniel ran to join me. 

"Have you found them?" he asked quickly.

"Yes, they're somewhere under this pile in front of the fireplace," I answered.  He immediately started ripping at the wood and tin with his bare hands.

"HEY!" Dan yelled out.  "Get out of there before you hurt yourself.  Let the tools do the heavy work."  He stuck the business end of the saw into the remains of the cabin and soon had a hole large enough that we could look into and see Derek's face.

"Get Brendan, he's hurt," Derek called out.

"Where is he?" Dan asked.

"He's…. Well, he's behind me," Derek answered with just a little hesitation.  Had it been lighter, we would have seen the blush as he tried to explain where Brendan was.

"Ok, son, now you just hang on there, and I'll have you two out in no time," Dan told him.

"Get a blanket or something," Derek called.

"Are you cold?" Daniel asked him.

"No, we're… umm… well, we're naked," Derek admitted.

"Never mind that, are you ok?" I asked him.

"I'm ok, Dad," he told me.  "Brendan kept me from getting hit.  Dad, he won't answer me.  I can't get him to say anything."

"Oh my god!" Karen gasped.

"Don't worry until we're sure we need to, woman," Dan ordered.  "Stand back, everybody."  He went back to work with the chain saw and within a few minutes we could see the two boys.  They had been…. Well, let's just say they were in a compromising position.  Karen looked in and blushed, before saying she would get the emergency blanket out of the truck.

"Do you think it is safe to move him?" Edan asked.

"It's safer than leaving him," Dan offered.

"Are you guys talking about me?" Brendan asked groggily.  "Somebody want to tell me the name of the guy I'm going to kill for hitting me from behind?"

"He sounds all right," Daniel laughed.

"Let me up, will you?" Brendan was fussing.

"You may be hurt," I told him.

"Yeah, I'm hurt," he responded.  "I've got the headache from hell, and you guys are talking about me like I'm not here."

By this time, Karen had returned with the blanket.  I took it from her and wrapped it around the boys as they crawled out of the pile of kindling that was all that was left of the cabin.  We got them back to the house and Brooke met us all at the door with a pile of warm towels.

"We put them in the dryer so they would be warm for you," she answered our unspoken questions.

Peter had grabbed the blanket off the bed in the Master Bedroom when he saw Derek and Brendan trying to share the tiny little emergency blanket.  The older boys thanked him and promptly got wrapped in hugs from both younger boys.  Several attempts to dislodge them were unsuccessful.

"Guys, we're fine," Brendan told them.  "I just got hit on the head, that's all."

"Yeah and you flattened my cabin," Karen said threateningly.  I could see the twinkle of mischief in her eyes, though.

"It wasn't us, it was the tree," Derek defended.

"I ain't scared of you," Brendan smarted off.  "My big brother can take you."

"Not so fast, Bren," I corrected him.  "You may not be afraid of her, but that don't mean I'm not."

Just at that moment, the phone rang.  At three o'clock in the morning, it couldn't be good news.  Randy's doctor began apologizing as soon I said hello.  Randy was gone, he had passed away in his sleep.  I thanked the doctor and turned back to the room full of family gathered around Edan.  I saw that I didn't need to tell them what had happened.

There was a single tear on Edan's cheek as I walked up and wrapped my arms around him, joining the boys in a group hug.  He returned the hug, but he stepped away for a second.

"I'm all right, guys, really."  He looked each of the boys in the eye before turning his face to me, and holding out his hand.  I took it mine as I stepped closer.  "I feel bad that a friend has passed, ok a little more than a friend, but not much more.  I would have been more hurt if you boys had been injured tonight.  If something were to happen to Cam, I don't know if I could go on.  Randy was a huge part of my life, but the emphasis is on the past tense.  It was good to see him again so that he and I were able to say goodbye.  I do admit that this news would upset me more if it weren't for that.  The bottom line is that I have lost a good friend, but I still have my family with me."

Brendan finally agreed to let me take him in to the emergency room to be checked out.  We were in luck as Dr. Martin was on call that night.  He ordered all sorts of pictures to be taken of Brendan's head and showed us the good news.  There was no real danger.

"Typical teenager, the head is the hardest thing on the body… at both ends," he added with a smirk.  I had told him the entire story of how we had found the boys so he had to tease my little brother a little bit.

Brendan swore revenge of course, but when he stood up to emphasize the point, he began to sway.  He told us he felt very dizzy and would rather sit down a while and would get me back later.  I laughed a little at him, but Dr. Martin didn't.

"I'm afraid you have a mild concussion, young man," he told Bren.  "You're back on light duty again, at least for a few days.  Those bruises are going to need some time to heal anyway.  This time the restricted duty includes one extra stipulation, though.  No nookie until I tell you it's ok."

"That's no problem, I don't know what it is, so I shouldn't miss it too much," the overconfident teen said proudly.

"I think he needs a modern translation, doc," I said with an anticipatory grin.

"Are you two implying that I may be advancing in years?" Dr. Martin asked with a laugh.  To Brendan he said, "No sex of any kind at all until further notice.  Is that understood?"

"AWWW  MAAAANN!!!!" my little brother wailed.  "That's just wrong."

"It would feel a lot more wrong if your brain started hemorrhaging from too much activity," Doc warned.  "I mean this.  Ask your brother here if I won't check up on you to make sure you're behaving."

Brendan looked at me and I nodded seriously.  "He has spies all over the place," I said aloud.

"This bites!" Brendan complained.

"From the looks of your neck, it looks like Derek does too," I teased.  Brendan flushed a lovely shade of red and ducked his head.

"Go home and tell that horndog boyfriend of yours that you are off limits until further notice," Doc instructed.

The next day we were contacted by Randy's attorney who told us again that Randy had passed away.  He went over some of the details that Randy had already told us about, like the fact that Randy wanted to be cremated and have his ashes sprinkled over the beach behind the house.  He also told us that the official word from the city council was negative.  They would not allow us to do it.  He then surprised us by saying that we should just go out at night and do it anyway.

"You are advising us to break the law?" I asked.

"I am indeed," the man said firmly.  "The city council is so concerned about tourists and their impressions of the town.  They have forgotten that people live and die here all year long.  The locals keep this place alive and functioning just as much as the tourists do.  Besides all that, Randy was one of my best friends in the world.  If the truth be known, I would have liked to have been more, but Randy was never interested in me."

The arrangements were already made for the cremation and the lawyer said he would keep the ashes at his office for us until we could get to Cape Cod to have the memorial.  A number of the guys that had worked for Randy had asked about a wake, so we told the attorney to arrange something for the week the boys had Spring Break, which was only two weeks away.

We flew to Boston and rented a minivan for the drive to the small town on the cape.  Since Edan was familiar with the area, he did the driving.  I had to admit, by the time we got out of Boston, I was glad that he was driving.  There seemed to be little rhyme or reason to the way the other people were driving.  I was terrified to the point that I had my eyes closed for the last half of the trip out of the city.

"You can open your eyes now, Ephraim," Derek called out with a laugh.

"Does that mean I can open mine?" I asked.  Ephraim looked at me with a mixture of surprise and relief.

The boys and I were impressed by the bridge over the Cape Cod Canal.  Edan told us we were in luck as there was a ship going through as we crossed.  I had seen plenty of ships that size and larger before, but the boys were astounded by the immensity of the freighter.

The quaint little village we arrived in was like something out of a Norman Rockwell picture.  I quickly learned that the Cape Cod style of architecture was very aptly named.  It seemed every house on the cape looked alike.

The cottage where Randy had lived had a great view of the Atlantic Ocean out the back and the front door was facing the Pilgrim's Monument.  To our surprise, there were pictures of Edan all over the little house.  Naturally they were all old pictures from the time that he and Randy had been together.  Many of them were stills from some of their films.  I was glad that the boys had opted to stay at the hotel when we came to the house the first time.  It gave us a chance to take down the nudes before Ephraim saw them.

Edan wept openly at the memorial, but still managed to keep focused on me and the boys.  He explained again that although a certain part of him was and would always be in love with Randy, his feelings for me and the boys held a much more important place in his heart.

"Randy is…was my past," he told me.  "You are my future, you and our boys."  He grew quiet and began to fidget with something in his pocket.  "Let's take a walk down the beach for a bit."

The shores of Cape Cod were beautiful that night.  There was a full moon shining down on us as we listened to the waves crashing on the beach.  It was still a bit cool that early in spring, so we were wearing windbreakers.  I noticed that Edan kept one hand in his pocket as he led me along the sand.  His other hand held mine.  We walked in comfortable silence for a few minutes before he stopped us.

"I meant what I said about you being my future," Edan almost whispered.  "I want us to spend the rest of our lives together."

I looked down and noticed a small box in his outstretched hand.  My hands were shaking as I took it and opened it.  Inside was a very handsome man's ring.  It was white gold with a diamond in the middle of a cluster setting.  The five colors of the pride rainbow surrounded the diamond represented by various semiprecious stones.  Below the cluster setting on each side of the band was triangle of pink quartz.

"My god, Edan; it's gorgeous," I exclaimed.  "These are real stones, aren't they?"

"Well of course they're real," he replied with mock indignation.  Then with all seriousness and another tear in his eye, he added, "You deserve only the best."

"This had to cost a fortune though," I protested.  "This is too extravagant.  When and where would I wear this??"  Ok I admit it.  Blondes don't always catch on the quickest.

"Well most people wear their engagement rings all the time, everywhere they go," he responded.  "Cameron Michael Ragland, I want to take you to Vermont and have a civil union ceremony.  Will you marry me?"  He had even gotten down on one knee as he proposed.

I was speechless.  Shut up!  I really was.  Through tears of complete happiness, I could only nod my head as I threw myself into his arms.  We tumbled into the sand as we shared the most romantic and most passionate kiss we had ever had.

"Was that a yes?" Edan teased when I finally released him.  He slipped the ring on my finger, and I hugged him again."

"I'll follow you to Vermont even if we have to walk to get there," I vowed.  "Yes, I will marry you.  I will civilly unite with you, whatever it's called.  I will stay with you forever and beyond."  We shared another kiss and then I jumped up and stretched my newly adorned hand to the sky and screamed, "I'm engaged!!!!!"

A drag queen on the boardwalk nearby yelled back, "You go, girlfriend!"

We went back to the hotel where we were staying.  As we were walking, I mentioned again that Edan shouldn't have spent so much money on the ring.  It was really too much.

"Cammy, you are worth so much more to me than that ring," he answered as we rode up to the room in the elevator.  "Besides, I have to confess that it didn't set us back at all."

"This is an expensive ring," I protested.  "I know better than that."

"I designed the ring myself and then sold the design to Professor Eric Tuttle in the Art department at school.  He and his partner Jack Grayson make jewelry for pride events, and they own a small shop or two."

"Jack Grayson as in J. Grayson Jewelers?"  I asked.  He nodded.  "A shop or two?  He owns nine little shops all over the state," I corrected.

"Well Jack and Eric made the ring for me, and Jack liked the design so much he asked to buy the rights to it," Edan explained.  "He made this ring for free as payment for the design.  Eric says they have already sold six more of these."  He looked down a little for a moment as he asked, "You don't mind that other people are going to be wearing your ring, do you?"

"They won't be," I told him firmly.  "This is my ring, they're getting copies.  I still can't believe that he made this for free, though."

"Well, I did pay for the stones to be upgraded from CZ and manmade to the real things," he admitted finally.

"I knew it," I smirked.  "You blew a fortune on me."  I realized what I said and immediately told him, "Let it go, gutter mind."

"Cam, I think you should know that what I spent on that ring won't even be noticed in our bank account," he tried to tell me.

"This must have cost almost as much as the farm, Edan," I protested.

"Well, actually it was a little more, but it's ok," he soothed.  "Cameron, Randy named me as his sole beneficiary," Edan explained.  "I know we had made good money when we were together, but I had no idea how successful he became after I left.  The attorney told me last week that Randy's estate is estimated at forty million dollars, and they hadn't received the payment for the studio sale yet."

"Did you just say forty million?" I whispered.  He nodded.

"The sale of the studio is bringing in another 15 million on top of that," he informed me.  It was a good thing we had made it back to our suite, because I had to sit down.

"You're worth 55 million dollars now?" I squeaked.

"I would prefer the phrase we are worth, but we aren't worth 55 million," he told me.

"Well, of course there's taxes and stuff," I said quickly.

"No, I mean the day before he went into the hospital the last time he bought a lottery ticket," Edan began.  "When he died, the ticket became mine.  The drawing wasn't until the day after he died, so that means I won."

"How much was the jackpot?" I asked expecting to hear an amount in the range 500 to 1,000 dollars.

"Well the ticket was for a lump sum instead of annual payments."  He saw the look of impatience on my face.  I still thought he was playing some little joke on me.  "Cameron, we're going back to Boston tomorrow to pick up a check for 247 million dollars," he answered.