I Want Jasper

Damn, I miss Jasper. We were flying together, enjoying fruits, when suddenly there was that loud noise and before we could escape, there was that net over us. I miss Jasper so much. Life was good. We were free. Oh, you don't know how important something is until you have lost it.

Anyways, back to my story. We were captured together, and put in those cages, packed together like seeds in a pod. Water was scarce, they put something over the cage to prevent us from figuring where we were going, I think, and we got so scared we quieted down. I don't know how many days we were kept in that cage, but many of us refused to eat and died. Me? I had hope, still had hope, I was with Jasper.

At long last those that had captured us moved us to a bigger cage, and there was light. Jasper and I were still together, and shared a corner of the cage. But we still weren't free, we weren't home, that was for sure. I figure those that were sick got killed, because they weren't with us in that bigger cage. We never saw them again.

Yesterday, they took Jasper. I have no idea what happened, but I've not seen him since. I am worried and I've decided that, without Jasper, life wasn't worth fighting for. So I've not eaten yet today, and it's hard not to drink too, but if I am to be alone, I prefer being dead.

* * *

They are coming! They are coming! Who will they pick today? Me? I don't want to be picked! Leave me alone! Don't you respect my sorrow, you bastards?

'OWWW! That damn bird bit me! I should twist its neck and be rid of it!'

'Damn fool, told you to put on gloves before handling them. Now get to the nursing station to get treated. You don't want to get a birdy infection and fly off for hell as a black angel, you fool!'

'I'll fool you one of these days, you bugger. Now in that cage with that female, and you better fuck her right there!'

Wow. That felt good, I got even with the bastard! Now then, what's this? A female? Leave me alone! All I want is Jasper!

I said stay on your side, you salacious bitch! I am not interested in you, I want my Jasper, and you aren't Jasper! Get lost!

No use playing hard to get, I just don't want to get you! Got it? What? Threats? Who do you think I am, an easy-go-lazy stud fucker? Now, it's insults? Oh, get real! Calling me a fudge-packer isn't going to get you anywhere with me, all the males do it!

'Ah, they are doing the mating dance. All the posturing to attract a female! Maybe this one will do the trick! Notice how the mating dance derived from the fight or flee dance?'

'You sure you read this one right?'

'Yes, yes!'

No use climbing on your high heels, bitch, I am not interested in you. I'm married and I intend to stay that way, even after death! No, no, no submissive positioning either will do! Get lost, you whore!

'See, the female is telling him he's acceptable, and he is dominant, we'll get something out of that couple!'

No use showing me your cute hole! I am not interested! The only hole I want is Jasper's! Do I need to spell it out? Stop getting closer or you'll regret it! No, your perfume of rut makes me want to puke, not mount you, Madam! Where have I landed myself in? Is this a brothel for birds?

'Ah. She is ready; she's offering herself to him for the fuck! Now comes the interesting part!'

'You are a pervert, you know! You practice voyeurism on birds! I wonder what else you watch?'

'Ah shut up, they're only animals!'

'I'm surprised I've not seen you jack off watching them mate! Come to think of it, the bathroom does have a funny smell after there's a successful mating! Should I investigate what I'll find on the far wall?'

'Now, who's calling me a pervert? Keep your nose out of my pants!'

'Don't worry, I don't need to put the nose in them to notice you need a scrub-down!'

I said keep away from me bitch! It's war you want? It's war you get!

¨Damn, look at the fight! The male attacked the female and is trying to blind her!'

'Stop gawking and separate them! We had that with the previous pair and you reacted too slowly! We lost a cute female, so move your ass this time!'

'Where should I put it?'

'Put him with that other aggressive male! At least, if they fight it off, we'll be rid of two fuckers!'

* * *

Jasper! Jasper! You are ok! I thought I had lost you! I am so relieved! What happened?

Oh? They put you with that female and she tried to rape you and you killed her? That happened to me too, just now, but they didn't let me kill the whore! Too bad, I wasn't fast enough. Let's preen our feathers; we both look like an eagle attacked us!

'Damn, look at these two! They are preening each other like two lovers! Isn't that cute!'

'Fuck! Queer birds! I wonder what's wrong with the air in San Francisco if birds are turning queer!'

'I don't know, but they are acting like a married couple! I wonder if proposition 8 applies to birds? That prosecutor, what's his name?'

'Kenneth Starr.'

'Yes, Kenneth Starr, wonder what he would make about them married birds?'

'I don't know, but I do know what I will be doing to their neck. I won't put up with these aberrations reproducing in the aviary!'

'Well, if two males manage to lay an egg, I want to see it!'

'But it's against nature! Males are to fuck females, and that's all there is to it! I'm a family man!'

'Given how you treat your family, buster, I would recall that statement like General Motors recalls cars! The only things you feed with your pay are your oversized arse and the one-armed bandit! Your wife works at the bar around the corner to feed the two youngest, while your older boy sells his arse or his mouth in the back alley! The only thing you contributed to them was your sperm, and then, I'm not even sure it was yours, bastard!'

'Are you telling me my boy is selling his self? I'll kill the little fag!'

'Oh no, you won't! You going to sit on your brain and start thinking. You are so full of it you fart by the mouth and breath by the bottom hole! I've just had enough of your comments on them 'wimps', 'sissies', 'limp wrists', 'fags' and 'queers'! Some days, mister, I wonder who got the birdbrain, you or them parrots! Your brain does keep strange company: his nearest neighbours are two nuts and a dickhead, you foul-mouthed arse hole! Meanwhile, I got a call to make! I know exactly the kind of customers for them two love birds!'

* * *

'Hey, Can I speak to Harry? It is Mark, from the aviary, calling.'

'Harry? Are you and your partner interested in parrots? ... A couple! … Oh they are special for sure, they are like you and your partner! ... No, I am not joking! A pair of gay parrots, they would do nice on a three dollar bill! Hahaha! … Yep, that could crucify the against nature argument of Starr! You could return the argument and shove it up his tight arse! ... You takers? … How much? Let's see, 4,000 for the pair! Sold? Sold! When do you want to pick them up? Right away? Sure, they are in a cage alone, I'll even supply the cage and a month's worth of food.'