Dear Diary

 

Priscilla walked nervously in the door of Doug's newly opened Division Medical Bay looking around as she held Danny's hand tightly.  He looked as worried as she felt, but he tried to set her mind at ease nonetheless.  "Princess, I'm sure our baby is fine," he said as his voice cracked a bit.  "Kyle and his family, or anyone else in the Clan, would never do anything that would endanger you or either of our girls."

"But nobody knew I was pregnant when we left for Archnania," she protested.  "We were there for six months, so why am I not already humongous?  Why haven't I already given birth?"

"Wait... we were there for six months, so Bethany should be seven months old now, but she's still super tiny and not sitting up or anything yet," Danny blurted.  "UNCLE DOUG!" he yelled out.  "What's wrong with my girls?"

"Uncle Doug?" the android questioned as he stepped out of his office.  "And please don't get in a habit of yelling in my medical bay."

"You're Mamee's brother, so that makes you Danny, Danielle, Davey, and Dixon's uncle," Priscilla explained.  "Now back to the questions we have for you.  Why am I not a bloated whale?"

"Do you want to be a bloated whale?" Doug asked in confusion.

"Why isn't she gorgeously rounded with our little girl, Uncle Doug?" Danny asked.  "We were on Archnania for six months.  She should be like seven or eight months along now.  Princess is still super sexy model size."  Their discussion was suddenly interrupted by Priscilla laying a lip lock on Danny that had him nearly fainting.  "What was that about?" he asked in a dazed whisper when she pulled away.

"That was for saying the right thing twice," Priscilla told him with a happy smile, and then she hugged him tightly.

"What'd I say?" Danny whispered to Doug.

"Don't look at me," Doug told him with a shrug.  "I may be a doctor and an android, but I'm still gay.  All I know about girls is medical, not behavioral.  You do raise other interesting questions, however.  Step over here to the bed, Priscilla and we will do some more in-depth scans on you and the baby.  I was going to have you come in to see me for a prenatal checkup this week anyway."

"Do I need to get undressed?" the girl asked with a nervous glance at Daniel.

"You aren't dealing with an ordinary doctor or ordinary facility, my dear.  The Clan has access to the full range of Starfleet medical technology, plus a few advances they aren't aware of yet, but you didn't hear that from me," Doug told her.  "That said, I think I should point out that you and Daniel share one child already and have another on the way.  If you both feel ready to take your relationship to another level, everyone will understand and support you at this point."  He noted the blushes and squirming of both people listening to him and quickly continued.  "It is also just as fine with all of us if you want to wait.  Quite bluntly, it is nobody's business but yours what you do with your private time together.  For the sake of the numerous gay members of the family, I do ask however that you do not broadcast in any way or form, and yes, I will have the same discussion with Danielle, Dixon, and Davey for you."

"We've already learned to block each other when we want to, Uncle Doug," Danny confirmed.  "I might wish it was a little sooner, because I truly never needed to know what Xander or Jessie looked like without clothes, but yeah, we're all good now."

"Glad to hear it," Doug said and then turned back to study the readings on the display being fed to his tablet.  "Priscilla, both you and your baby are in perfect health.  Literally.  By all indications, you are right on the dot two months pregnant."

"I don't understand," Priscilla mumbled.  "How can I only be two months if we spent six months on Archnania?  Shouldn't I be seven or eight months?"

"I can only tell you what the instruments are confirming for me," Doug told her.  "You are currently two months pregnant.  The scans can't tell gender, but I see no reason to doubt the word of Quint when he told us that this baby is going to be Bethany's sister."

"But how did the baby not age during those six months?" Danny asked.  Before Doug could answer, Huey stepped into the medical bay.

"Doug, where are you?" Huey called out.  "Babe you gotta check me over.  I've lost so much weight my clothes don't fit me and while I was in the shower just now all but like four of my pubes fell..... You could have let me know you had people in here," he blushed as he saw Priscilla and Danny.

"You didn't give him a chance, baldy," Danny snorted.

"Hey!  I still have four which I bet is still more than you've got," Huey snapped back.

"Okay stop the squabbling right now," Doug ordered.  "Hop up on the next bed over from Priscilla, love.  Let's see what is going on."  Doug stared at his tablet in confusion and then he stared at the monitor over the bed.  He restarted his tablet and the bed both, and then glared at the readings.  "Now that's just not possible."

"What's not possible?  What's going on?" Huey demanded.

"It's not cancer is it?" Priscilla asked softly.

"It's not cancer!" Huey blurted.  "Why would you say that?"

"Well, with significant weight loss and your hair falling out...." Danny mumbled with a shrug.

"It's not cancer.  Dougie tell them it's not cancer.  Tell me it's not."

"Relax, love, it's definitely not cancer.  You are in great condition," Doug assured him.  "In fact, you are an absolutely perfectly healthy fourteen-year-old male."

"Umm... Uncle Doug, I thought Huey was sixteen," Danny spoke up.

"I am sixteen," Huey stated firmly.

"Actually... according to your bio scans, love, you're not," Doug corrected.  "These readings show that you are at peak development for a fourteen-year-old male."  Doug frowned and paced back and forth between the two beds looking at the scans, and then slapped his communicator.  "This is Divisional Chief Medical Officer Douglas Whatley.  All personnel and family members who went to Archnania last week are needed to the Medical Bay in HQ as soon as possible.  Please remain calm, but get here at your earliest convenience."

"Douglas Fairbanks Whatley, just exactly what do you mean by scaring everyone like that?" Mamee scolded as she, Auntie Rene, and Uncle Osgood entered the medical bay.  "What is going on little brother?"

"Something very odd seems to be happening and I need more input before I can make any sort of hypothesis," the android doctor said quickly as he ushered each of the three elders onto biobeds for scans.  "Hmmm as I suspected, but you all seem to have lost more years than Huey did.  Curious."

"What you meant lost years?" Auntie Rene demanded.  "This cause from the cancer?"

"What cancer would that be my magnolia blossom?" Uncle Osgood asked pointedly.

"I spoke with you about that later," Auntie Rene blushed.  "Told me quick little doctor boy, has I got the cancer back?"

"Absolutely not," Doug said firmly.  "In fact, there aren't even any indicators that you ever had the cancer, to begin with anymore.  You are one of the healthiest sixty-year-olds I have ever even heard of.  All three of you."

"Douglas, you run a diagnostic on yourself right now," Mamee ordered.  "Thibbie, dear, get Nate in here now.  Huey, fetch your gadgets and check him out."

"Amee, I am perfectly fine and so are you," Doug told her with a roll of his eyes.  "I don't know quite how to explain it yet, but everyone that went to Archnania seems to be in perfect health, and at their optimum age.  I just don't understand how."

"Mamee, what's the problem?" Nate gasped as he materialized in the room with a crescent wrench in his hand and covered in grease and oil.

"Doctor Whatley, report please," Dixon stated in his commander's voice as he walked into the medical bay with Jessie.  "Do I need to call an emergency status?"

"My apologies, Director, I may have chosen poor wording in my communication.  There is no emergency," Doug said sheepishly.

"Well, what is going on then, Uncle Doug?" Dixon asked as he relaxed back to his normal speech patterns.

"It is too an emergency," Huey pouted as he placed his hands protectively over his crotch.

"At fourteen, you are still older than my physical appearance of age, love," Doug told him reassuringly.  "I swear I won't love you any less even if you lose all your tickly hairs."

"Can we NOT discuss my pubes in front of the whole division, please," Huey whined.

"Yes, please, I did just eat," Danielle snarked as she entered the medical bay.  "I would much rather be.... sleeping right now."

"Sleeping? Is that what you and Bambi call it?" Davey teased as he walked in. 

"Well, what do you call it? Sandwiching?" Danielle snorted back.  "Ugh... mental images.  Now I really have lost my appetite."

"Do you really have a problem with Davey being with us?" Xandra asked worriedly.

"Yeah, if any of you has a problem with it, we can leave and...." Xander started beside her.

"And what?" JB asked as he walked in and hugged his twins.  "Me and you Daddy be mighty sad we lose our wonder twins.  Somebody here got the problem with you, they got the problem with me, too."

"No one has a problem with the two of you, or the three of you," Dixon assured them as he came over and hugged them both as well. 

"Xander, Xandra, I am truly very sorry if any of my teasing of my brother made you feel unwelcomed or unloved here," Danielle said sincerely.  "I only meant to tease Davey the way he teases me.  He and I both know because of our mental connection that we love each other; we just express it a little differently than most people do.  I never, never wanted or intended to make either of you feel badly, I swear.  Xander, you and Jessie are the nicest brothers-in-law I could ever ask for, and Xandra, you and Priscilla are the sisters I never had before."

"You don't think that because I'm pregnant at twelve that I'm a trashy...." Priscilla started and was suddenly group hugged by everyone in the room.

"Miss Priscilla, you EVER get called a name like you were about to say, you tell me.  Cause whatever is left of that person when your family gets done with them, will be mine to dispose of and trust me when I say that I have ideas for dealing with such things that even my original family would shy away from," Bambi stated as she stood in the doorway of the room looking at everyone.

"Remind me to NEVER tease Vampyra again," Davey whispered as he hid behind Xander.

"I heard that," Bambi called out.  "Killing you would be counterproductive to my assignment to protect the family here, David, but I can do a great many things to you without killing you."  She did wink at Dixon to let him know she was teasing the troublesome member of the quad.

"Lieutenant, you have free reign to avenge yours and my sister's honor in non-lethal ways against my brother Big Mouth," Dixon announced. 

"DIXIE!" Davey whined.  "You're supposed to be on my side."

"I am on my side, bro," Dixon smiled.  "I have no problems with teasing and fun, Davey, but if you go too far with it, you should face the consequences just like anyone else."

"Can we please get back to the scans now?" Doug called out.  "I am now going on the assumption that everyone who has been to Archnania has been affected in some way, albeit all in positive ways so far, but that still means I now need new baseline information for everyone."

"Unca Dougie, you really think that Kyle and Tyler or Cory would let anybody go somewhere that would hurt them?"  Everyone looked over to see Zipper standing in the doorway of the Medical Bay with his tiny hands on his hips.  "Member what Unca DK got told after the fight at the park?  Go with the flow."  Everyone then gasped as he disappeared without being transported.

"On that note, Jessie and I need to get going to make our inspections of the fleet," Dixon finally said after a moment of silence in the room.

"Not before your baseline scans, Director," Doug said with his arms folded across his chest and his foot tapping.

"He got that look from you, you know," Dixon told Mamee with a pout.

"Yes, I believe he did," the old woman smiled proudly.  "Well done, little brother, well done indeed."